lost

i am drowning..

i cant seem to even stay afloat. tis is the first time i ever felt tis way before..
its so scary and it becomes even more scary becos i havent realli got anyone to cry out to..

well i do haf someone, he is the BIG GUy in the sky.. he'll always be there for me no matter wad. but it jus seems lik i cant realli trust anyone on tis earth.. nt evn the ppl closest to me..

somehow coming back frm the YAG retreat has opened up my eyes a little.. i am able to see my frenships and haf evaluated many of them. and to my horror, most of them are frens tt i can actually do without.. bt yet, there are those that i need.. its so weird just thinking thots like tt and wondering wad to do..

Pastor did warned us tht aft the retreat some of us might leave it with evn lesser frens den before. but he hopes tht the lessons learnt wont go to waste and from there we'll learn to make new frens..

but why do we nd frens?
issit even neccessary?
SOmeone asked a very interesting qn once, if we have frens den why do we need to marry?
cant i just survive with beign frens?

too many questions, too little time...
someone pls just shoot me...